Enough

There just aren’t enough hours in the day.

I have spent the past 4 days pretty much solidly in my neuroscience textbook trying to understand and memorize the incredible amount of terms and concepts that make our brains what they are. I’m not really a crammer – but this was my back up course (Sadly, I didn’t get into stats) and I didn’t think the test was until next week. It was today and thankfully it went well. I have a paper to finish and then, I thought I’d have some time to breathe.

Ha! Checked my email and was reminded that i have a term test on Monday. How did it get to be October already??!!!

I was talking to one of my best friend’s tonight and she said that as a student you always feel like you are behind.

I haven’t finished unpacking yet. I called into work sick yesterday so I have to make that up later this week. My email inbox is full. My to do list is multiplying by the second.

One friend once said I tend to pack into a day what 3 people do – and that was before I started full time school and part time work.

And still – I find – there are not enough hours in the day.

When will enough be enough?

There is always more I can study, one more paper to add to the research, another person to help.

I’ve always admired my friend Laura – she is super woman. She does more in a day than what I have ever managed to do – and she does it well. She’s definitely my inspiration that school and work and community and service and rest and play and baking (She is the best baker I know!) can happen.

But how?

If I cut out sleep, I’m too tired. If I cut out prayer, I’m too drained. If I cut out people, I’m too depressed. If I cut out study, my grades suffer. If I cut out work, I can’t afford to go to school.

There aren’t enough hours in the day.

Maybe that doesn’t matter.

Maybe I need to trust that in this moment, God is here. And that is enough.

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